Talk to the Hand
by Tsubame-go
Summary: Kagome learns an American phrase, and puts it to her own use. So do her friends in feudal Japan. No real pairings. Rated T to be safe.


**I know, this story is reeeeally random but please enjoy it. I do not own Inuyasha and it's characters.  


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"Whaaaaaat! A month! Wait, how long I that?" Inuyasha bellowed.

"A month is usually about thirty days. I will be gone for twenty." Kagome answered with a sigh, how could she explain that she and her family were going on a trip to America when he didn't even know what or were America was?

"What about looking for jewel shards? You're the one who can sense them remember?" the hanyou paused. "And it's not like Naraku's gonna just sit on his ass while you're gone, he'll be getting the jewel shards while you'reout of the picture!"

Kagome shot him a furious glance. "Inuyasha… SIT!"

And while he was still down she leaped back down the well.

"(I've had enough of your bullshit! Talk to the hand!)"_That girl looked really angry… _but_ why did she just hold out her palm?_ Kagome had only understood '(I've had enough of your Bullshit)' so she consulted her English to Japanese dictionary to translate the rest of what the girl had said. _What? 'Talk to the Hand'_? Later at the hotel Kagome found use of this new American phrase she had learned.

"Sota! Would you please stop begging!" Kagome scolded her little brother as he begged for her chips. "Sota, you already had ice cream today!"

"But I want chips…" he whined.

"Sota… Talk to the hand!"

_One month later…_

"Inuyasha, I have a life on the other side you know!" Kagome snapped, she was thoroughly tired of Inuyasha's rant of complaints about how difficult searching for jewel shards and Naraku had been while she was gone.

"You're the only one we have who can sense jewel shards, or have you forgotten how important that skill is!" Inuyasha argued. Kagome sighed; neither Miroku, Sango nor even Shippo had complained about her absence, why couldn't Inuyasha just give her a break?

"Inuyasha…" Kagome started in an angry tone, "talk to the hand!" she exclaimed and thrust her palm in front of his face, which now held a thoroughly confused expression.

"What was that supposed to be?" Inuyasha asked riddled with confusion.

_A few hours later…_

"Give me the sacred jewel or die!" The eagle-demon roared. Inuyasha reached for the tetsusaiga only to find he had left it back at the village; but this wasn't the strongest demon in the world, so he could still defeat it. A thought crossed Inuyasha's mind, a smile crossed his lips; he was going to have a bit of fun with this.

"Taaalk to... The HAND!" the half-demon roar as his iron reaver cut through the demon. Unfortunately for himself, Inuyasha wasn't the only one who was able to use that phrase, nor was he the person who had the best use for it.

The demon's flesh gave a twitch, Inuyasha turned; ready to cut into it again. "Don't worry, Inuyasha. I've got this under control!" Miroku called to him, slipping the prayer beads from his right hand. "Talk to th hand!" the monk yelled triumphantly as the demon was sucked into his body. Sighing, Kagome rolled her eye. _"They just do __not__ get it…"_ she thought to herself and shock her head.

_Later, back at the village…_

"Nothing like slaying a inferior demon," Inuyasha sighed as walked through the village.

"Inuyasha you're so barbaric! Some of us find joy in things far more refined then fighting," Miroku scolded the half-demon with a playful voice.

"How the hell is womanizing in any way refined!" Inuyasha groaned, seeing the monk eyeing a group of pretty village girls. "I'm sure any decent person would agree with me when I say it's completely vulgar!"

Ignoring his fuzzy eared companion, Miroku approached the group of girls. "Why hello ladies! May I ask how you have all grown so beautiful?" The pack of girls dissolved into giggles, each of their faces pink as peonies.

"Tell us, monk, who of us is the most stunning?" inquired one of the eldest girls, still giggling.

"Weeeell if I had to choose I'd have to say-"Miroku's voice was cut off by the cold gaze of a certain demon slayer who just happened to have been walking by. His blood ran cold as Sango began slowly walking closer and closer.

"You idiot…" She murmured icily, putting a special emphasis on the word idiot. A cold smile crossed her lips as she raised her arm. "TALK TO THE HAND!"

A slap rung out across the village.

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**So how did you like it? please let me know in a review!**


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